I cried myself to sleep last night, you know that silent cry, so not even your partner knows you are crying? I didn’t think that would happen this time around, but who was I kidding, really? I never have dry eyes through a parent teacher conference, I never have dry eyes through a choir concert, hell I barely have dry eyes through dinner most nights, so when I thought I was unaffected by my baby starting Kindergarten today I was really just kidding myself. He didn’t know I was sad, nor will he know tomorrow when I don’t even get to go inside the school with him. I got teary leaving Simon in his 3rd grade classroom and he barely even wanted me to set foot in the door with him.
We sprinkled magic dust under his pillow last night to help him peacefully sleep. I always check on my kids before bed, but there was something “right of passage y” about last night. Tomorrow will be the first full day elementary school for both of my kids – under the same roof – without me. They’ve grown into kids, officially. I know I’ll enjoy the change, just as soon as the newness wears off. I feel comforted knowing they are together at school, even if they don’t see one another throughout the entire day. I’m comforted knowing they’ll watch out for each other on the bus ride home tomorrow afternoon.
When Simon started Kindergarten he needed a little bit of extra love through the day, or a reminder that I was with him, even when I wasn’t right there. My heart was still with him. I stitched up a little cloth heart and we pinned it inside his pants each morning before school, until he didn’t need it anymore. My heart wasn’t really mine anymore after he was born.
And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
To make the power band I used Shepard’s Wool Yarn, which is probably my favorite yarn ever. I used size 8 dpns. I cast on 32 stitches and passed 8 onto each needle. I k2, p2 the entire way around – changing colors for the different powers that needed to be incorporated into the band and did 3 rows of each color combo. Ta Da – it was done and I am going to be happy to wear it just as soon as Gus doesn’t need it anymore.